If you’re experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption, one of the biggest questions you may have is whether you can choose the family who will raise your child. The answer is yes, and your choices will significantly shape your baby’s future.
The Missouri Alternatives to Abortion Program connects pregnant women with providers who walk alongside them through the adoption process. These providers offer information, resources, and emotional support so you can make decisions you feel confident about.
Understanding Adoption
Adoption can be a meaningful option if you feel parenting isn’t the right path. While adoption involves difficult emotions, it also allows you to know your child is growing up in a safe and supportive home that you had a hand in choosing.
As the birth mother, you work with an adoption agency to create a personalized adoption plan. This plan helps you outline what kind of family you want for your child, what type of contact you’d like, and the details that matter most to you. Adoptive families must meet strict requirements, including background checks and home studies, so you can feel confident your baby will be well cared for.
When choosing a family, you may want to consider:
- Values and Beliefs: Do you want your child raised in a home that shares your cultural background, faith, or worldview?
- Lifestyle: Some women prefer a family that lives in the city, while others may hope for a rural or suburban setting. You might also consider whether you’d like your child to grow up in a home with siblings or pets.
- Education and Opportunities: You may want adoptive parents who value education, extracurricular activities, or travel.
- Personality and Connection: Sometimes, the “fit” with a family is about more than factors like location or family type. Many birth mothers describe a sense of peace or connection when they meet the adoptive parents they eventually choose.
By considering these factors, you can feel confident that your choice aligns with the kind of future you imagine for your child.
Choosing the Type of Adoption
One of the unique aspects of adoption is that you decide how much contact to maintain after placement. There are three common plans to consider:
- Open Adoption: You may stay in contact with the adoptive family and child through letters, phone calls, or visits. This allows you to be part of your child’s life, but keep in mind that in Missouri, open adoption agreements are not legally enforceable and rely on mutual commitment.
- Semi-Open Adoption: Communication and updates are exchanged through a third party, such as an agency or attorney. This option allows for some contact while maintaining privacy.
- Closed Adoption: You and the adoptive family share no identifying information. This choice provides complete confidentiality and no ongoing contact.
What Providers Offer
Adoption services come at no cost to you as the birth mother. Our providers can connect you with licensed adoption agencies and professionals who ensure every detail is addressed. Additionally, medical expenses related to the pregnancy and delivery will be covered if insurance does not pay them.
Many providers also extend additional support, such as maternity clothing, housing assistance, and transportation throughout the process. The goal is to ensure you never feel alone as you move forward with your plan.
You qualify for assistance if you are a pregnant woman who:
- Wants to carry your unborn child to term
- Is a United States resident who lives in Missouri
- Makes less than 185% of the federal poverty level
Taking Your Next Step
Only you can decide what is right for your future, and no one should pressure you into a choice that doesn’t feel right. Adoption offers the unique opportunity to choose the family who will love and raise your child while giving you peace of mind about their future.
With support from Missouri’s Alternatives to Abortion Program, you’ll have access to providers and resources that allow you to explore this option confidently.
Contact us today to learn more or email DFAS.A2APROGRAMS@dss.mo.gov with your questions. You don’t have to walk this road alone—help is here.
